I'm going to a weekend yoga retreat in a few weeks - it's one my sister and I have been going to in recent years. It's a beautiful weekend and a real opportunity to connect back to myself and spend time with nurturing and supportive people.
Even though part of me is really looking forward to the weekend away, I also feel like I have let myself down.
In the busy/chaotic/exhilarating first year of being a mum, wife, friend, sister, daughter, part-time employee, soul seeker and business owner -
I've neglected my yoga practice.
My lack of dedication has now left me feeling shameful and vulnerable, as not only will I be taking my unpracticed self to my yoga retreat - I am also presenting a workshop to the beautiful people attending.
What thoughts are running through my mind?
As you can see, that from one simple fact -“ I have not been practising yoga on a regular basis because of competing demands” - comes a huge wave of shame, self-criticism and judgement. The irony is - when I dedicate time to yoga (followed by meditation) I feel amazing - connected to my body and my spirit, relaxed, calm and balanced.
However, motivation that comes from fear and shame is not sustainable. Real and lasting change comes from a place of self-acceptance, authenticity and love.
I have learned this lesson slowly over a number of years - and a recent book I read by Brene Brown (‘The Gifts of Imperfection’) really reminded me of this. So here I am, being authentic, vulnerable and looking at my ‘shame’ through a lense of self-compassion and kindness. As Brene Brown writes:
“Choosing authenticity means:
I am going to get my mat out once again and practice yoga as it makes me feel so great. However, I'm choosing to let go of the pressure, expectation and self-criticism.
Me and my dodgy downward facing dog are going to rock this yoga retreat!
Amanda is a (reformed) lawyer turned holistic life coach, self-care advocate, workshop facilitator, writer, speaker, avid reader, nature lover, chai tea drinker and mother to a curious, active toddler. A spirit seeker who loves connecting with others on journeys of self-discovery, Amanda believes we can all find our own version of success and live an empowered life.